Thursday, May 13, 2004

Nicotine lament.

There's shit happening all over the world right now. Bad shit. All I want is a cigarette. That wont save the world, wont make the bad stuff go away, but at least I'll feel a little better.

Man, it's been hard recently. The Feyonce is currently 2000 miles away or something. I've seen her for five weeks out of the last 52, and right now this is a bad can get nicotine patches y'know. Even one of them would do.

Sometimes I wonder what I was doing, y'know. Pissed as a fart, proposing. Sometimes the thought of actually having to live with the consequences of my actions for a change scares me, just like the thought of getting married scares me. I suppose most of that fear comes from the fact that the Feyonce is Finnish...who knows where our lives will end up. She can speak her native tongue, is fluent in Swedish and English, and has basic French and German. I'm from the East End of Glasgow: I can barely speak English.

And you know, I wouldn't care a damn thing about our future if she was here with me.

Or if I had a goddamn cigarette.

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